"Life Ain't Always Beautiful, But It's a Beautiful Ride"-- Blog Review

Although I have looked at other people's blogs sometimes, I never really considered getting one of my own. When the assignment was given, I was actually excited though! Throughout the semester I would get brilliant ideas  on what to blog about, but then by the time I got the chance to write it, I had already forgotten.

As I reflect on all of the things I have blogged about as a part of this assignment, I realized that I seemed to blog about a lot of events that have happened to me recently, or events that I have been thinking a lot about lately. Since we read the talk called "Sharing the Gospel Using the Internet" given by M. Russell Ballard, I tried to add spiritual insights in each blog post. When I wrote my posts, I imagined my audience being other adolescents who need the faith and assurance that they can keep going even through times that seem unbearable. A country song always seemed to come to my mind and the chorus says, "Life ain't always beautiful, but it's a beautiful ride." These lyrics seem to fit my life perfectly, and I am sure they can apply to almost everyone.

My testimony has definitely been strengthened during my first year of college at Brigham Young University. Even through trials and tribulations (a few of which I have blogged about), my faith and reliance in Christ,as well as in my family, was able to help me through these hard times. It's amazing how you can seen the hand of the Lord in everything that you do, if you take the time to recognize it. As I reread my blog posts, I was able to  be reassured of this concept and I also truly realized that everything happens for a reason. This blog will be very interesting for me to read in several years and to compare my testimony and insights. I hope to continue posting different blogs, and sharing my testimony as often as I can. The more I share my thoughts and beliefs, the stronger it seems to make them. I really enjoyed this assignment!

The Perfect Sunday!

Yesterday was just an amazing Sunday! I got up early so that my roommate could curl my hair, and then I headed to the church at about 9:30. Our ward's sacrament doesn't start until 10:00, but since I had to play the organ in sacrament, I went early so that I could practice the hymns and provide some prelude music. Today was fast and testimony meeting and the Spirit was very strong! Almost all of the men in our ward are return missionaries, so usually one by one they go up and hardly any girls get up. Well today was different. After two boys had gone, there was a brief pause so I took advantage of it and went up and bore my testimony. To my surprise, other girls began to get up and it was more balanced. I attended the Missionary Prep class and then Relief Society and the lessons were both very spiritual.

At 4:00 I had to return to the church for choir practice because I am the pianist. We practiced "What Child is This?" with a beautiful accompaniment. And then we all headed to the gym for break the fast. Then to top the day off, we went back to our apartment where we watched the First Presidency Christmas Devotional. As the true meaning of Christmas was told to us over and over, I made a commitment to myself that I would keep Christ in my heart this Christmas season, as well as throughout the whole year! As the movie they had us watch presented the story of Christ's birth, I was filled with joy and was humbled at the way that Christ, our Savior, entered this world in a stable. I am so thankful for the Christmas Season, but most of all I am thankful for my Savior who entered this world as a tiny babe: just like you and I. I am so thankful for the miracles that he performed and the example that he set for us. I know that he suffered for our pains and afflictions in the Garden of Gethsemane and that he died on the cross for each and everyone of us. I love my Savior and everything that he has done for me. He is someone that I can always count on; he is my best friend.

The Y

Andrea, Holly, Allyson, Steffany, and me at the beginning

 My roommates and I had this brilliant idea one night that we wanted to hike the Y. So we planned when we were going to go and decided that it would be fun to watch the sunrise once we made it up there. We all rolled out of bed early one Friday morning (as you can tell from the pictures), and drove to the trail head. We were all excited since none of us had ever hiked it before. Before long we were stopping to rest and to take some pictures. As we continued to hike up the mountain, we realized that we wouldn't get to see the sunrise because it was rising on the other side of the mountain. When we finally made it to the ginormous Y, we sat down on it and took some more pictures. The view from the top was absolutely beautiful! That morning was a very good bonding experience for us as roommates. And it was also an excellent workout!

Us on the Y!!

 

Steff and I 

From best friends in 2nd grade to college roomies :)

     Once upon a time in Cody, Wyoming, a new family moved into a house by mine during the summer. My siblings and I, and one of my little brother's friends, decided to go over to their red house and introduce ourselves. There was a girl, named Steffany, who was going to be in the 2nd grade, just like me! Although we didn't have the same teacher in 2nd grade, we still became friends and ended up with the same teacher in 3rd and 4th grade! During the summers we would have lemonade stands and other random adventures. During the school year, we would have tetherball tournaments at recess and both compete to be the smartest kid in class. We were best friends and were always hanging out together coming up with many fun, but random, games. Even though she moved away after 4th grade, we still kept in contact and visited each other during the summers.

     Little did we know, that several years later we would be rooming together in Provo, Utah and that we would both be attending Brigham Young University. At first I was a little worried because we hadn't spent more than a few days together since 4th grade! That was a long time ago, and we both had changed a lot! Those worries soon faded as we almost immediately picked up right where we left off.
     Sometimes we like to do weird things! We like to run really funny with really high knees and then jump into walls. We also like to stay up really late because we are both professional procrastinators and Facebook stalkers. :) We also like to reminisce back to the good old elementary days! Looking back now, I am so thankful that we stayed in touch and that we decided to room together. She is a great friend and is always there for me! Not a day goes by that she doesn't make me laugh! Another thing that we like to do is get hot chocolate from Maverik at midnight and Krispy Kreme Donuts at 2 am. We have created many memories together this semester, and I am looking forward to next semester when we will have two classes together! I just love my roommate and best friend. Her name is Steffany Beddes.

Facebook Drama: BYU vs USU

I found this argument hilarious and thought that others would enjoy reading some of these comebacks. Facebook drama makes me laugh! :) Enjoy!!! (These are all direct quotes! The only thing changed is the names of those who were involved)

USU Student #1: Frustrated with the people blaming the student section for the loss last night. Frustrated with the administration trying to ruin the spectrum magic. Let me tell you, the three minutes we sat in silence was the longest three minutes of a basketball game EVER. I love my Aggies, win or lose. So here's to a new season, and a new winning streak at home, starting NOW.


Random person: Is it true that the students were mad about/protesting the fact that the USU president issued a letter of apology for the crowd being inappropriate and rude?


No, we protested the fact that the administration was monitoring our cheers so much that we weren't allowed to point or say "stupid."


BYU STUDENT 1: Maybe if the USU fans wouldn't have acted so inappropriately at the BYU game, there wouldn't be problems with your administration monitoring your cheers. 


BYU STUDENT 2: Your student section took bad sportsmanship to a whole new level...also known as immaturity!


It's college sports. BYU knew how crazy USU gets and coming into the Spectrum they should have expected it. But that's not even what this is about. We could care less about a stupid apology letter. But then again, if BYU can't take the heat, they shouldn't come here. It's a little immature of BYU to call us immature and "classless." I'm not going to argue about it because I could care less about BYU.


So you're saying because it's college sports it's okay to have no sportsmanship? There's a difference between having school spirit and attacking the other team's players for something so personal. And this is about BYU, because if it wasn't for how your fans acted at that game you guys wouldn't have forced your administration to have to babysit you. 


USU Student #2: I don't feel USU fans acted inappropriately at the BYU game, I just feel the BYU fans and players are a little overly sensitive. We fans are NOT players, we don't have to have 'sportsmanship'.


So you admit that your fans don't have sportsmanship. Classy. 


If we would have done this to ANY other school, there wouldn't have been a problem, but because BYU is so uptight and worried about their PR, they freaked out on us. Davies is going to get a heck of a lot more heckling from other schools because BYU is BYU.
HAHAHAH! (Lists two peoples names) There we go again! BYU FANS CALLING US CLASSY! What the heck is it with BYU fans thinking they're SOO much more classier.


The thing is you guys wouldn't do that to any other school. If any LDS guy on any other team was going through the repentance process for something like that, I guarantee you wouldn't make fun of them. Maybe there's a reason BYU fans keep saying you don't have class. Because you don't. 


USU Student #3: Saying classy is in itself not classy.


Well for one, if there was an LDS guy on another team having to go through that, he would 1. Still be playing because it;s not against the rules at any other college and 2. Not receive heckling for that because no one would ever KNOW. BYU chose to make Davies probation and the reason behind that public knowledge, so now they need to deal with the fact that people are going to heckle Davies for that. Instead, they cry and whine that we were rude and "classless." GET OVER IT. Seriously.


No, we go to a school that doesn't dictate what we can say, wear, drink, and worship. Sorry we have the freedom at USU to express ourselves anyway we like. And furthermore, BYU announced to the entire nation what Davies did. EVERY opposing team that comes to the Spectrum gets heckled. BYU was NO exception.


And THIS is why I chose Utah State over BYU.


Did you even get accepted to BYU?


haha standard response


I didn't even bother applying because I made up my mind about USU a LONG time ago.


If you've argued with one Cougar, you've argued with them all. 


Ain't it the truth USU Student #3? Hahaha.


The same can be said for Aggies. Honestly, though, we chose BYU because we want to live by the Honor Code, not because we have to. Davies messed up and fixed it, so why do you feel the need to harass him for it? And you can't say you chose USU over BYU if you didn't even get accepted-whether you applied or not.


Quit trying to argue on Facebook, it's a waste of your time. Shouldn't you be reading your scriptures or something?


Oooh, good one. You're LDS, too, so you should be reading yours just as much as I should. 


Seriously, quit wasting my time. 


Can't think of any more comebacks, can you?


This is good.


Oh no, I've got plenty. But you might find them offensive and ask me to issue an apology.


Oh, were you going to make it personal and start a rude chant about my sex life? You're right, keep it to yourself.


Thought so.


When you get kicked out because of the Honor code and it gets picked up nationally on  ESPN and other networks we'll give you a yell


Random Person: ^^ this chicks a beezy. You're saying we aren't classy? Well at least we don't look down at people saying they aren't smart enough to get accepted into BYU...so take your unwanted attitude back to Provo. Kthanksbye(:


You're not supposed to have a sex-life if you go to BYU...


BYU Student #3: Dude, what's with all the hate? like, seriously. This isn't like a high school rivalry anymore. we're adults who go to Universities. Also, universities are about education, not sports. BTW, i go to BYU and I have a very good sex life... Just saying :)

Personal Narrative Final Draft

I Had the Time of My Life, With You

I was nice and cozy in my newly finished senior quilt, when I began to hear voices and movement around me. As I rolled over to see what time it was, my eyes squinted automatically as the bright sunlight shone down on me through the window. Once my eyes adjusted, I saw that my mom, grandma, and two little brothers were already awake. It took me awhile to remember that I was in my grandma’s room at the Assisted Living Center in Butte, Montana. I sat up on the pull-out bed as I stretched, and I was tempted to curl up in a ball and go back to sleep for a little while longer. However, that thought was interrupted as my mom told me that I needed to get in the shower and get ready for the day. After breakfast, we were going to head out to Whitehall, Montana, where there was an old-fashioned train bridge where we were going to take some senior pictures. Before getting in the shower, I decided to check my phone that had been charging on the other side of the room.

I had a text from my best friend, Jessie, asking me if I had heard the news. As I replied to that text, my mind was racing with the different possibilities that she could have been referring to. Right after I pressed SEND on my black Envy 2, my phone began to vibrate vigorously in my hands as I received several texts from some of my other friends. As I opened one of the texts, my eyes read over a couple of words that I never thought I would see. My legs became Jell-O and I fell to my knees as my world seemed to come crashing down on me. I checked the messages over and over, hoping and praying that I had somehow read it wrong. Tears rushed down my face as my mom came quickly over to me.

“Lyndsey! What happened?” my mom questioned as she wrapped me in hug. At that same moment, my little brother Trevor had read something on Facebook and knew exactly what was wrong.

Through many tears and in-between sobs, I tried to tell my mom what was going on, but all I could get out was, “Tylor. Killed. Car. Accident.”

            Jessie shared the details with me through text messages because she would start crying again if she tried calling me. After receiving the few details that were known at that point, I hopped in the shower as an escape from the dreadful texts that were being sent to my phone. My tears mixed with the water pouring out of the shower head, and my head was pounding. At that point, I didn’t even want to read the messages that were sent to me to offer comfort and words of support. All I wanted to do was throw my phone out of the window and wake up from this awful nightmare. How were any words supposed to provide the comfort that I needed at that time? The attempts seemed pointless. My best friend, Tylor Burke, had just been killed in a car accident, and there I was in Montana, five hours away! I got out of the shower and put on my maroon legging outfit that I had planned to wear for my senior pictures. The person that stared back at me in the mirror, however, did not look like she was ready to go take pictures. The girl in the mirror had glowing green eyes that were bloodshot, a blotchy skin tone, and red streaks that began at the corner of her eyes and continued down her face. She looked like a mess.

            “Lyndsey, do you want to come down and help me serve donuts and coffee downstairs? I am in charge this week and need some help,” said my grandma from the other room.

            “Sure Grandma! I would love to help you! Just give me a couple of minutes to finish brushing my hair,” I said trying to sound willing and excited. We both ignored the way my voice shook that didn’t quite match my attempted enthusiasm. I really did want to go help her; I was just not in the most social mood at the time.

While I finished brushing my long, brown hair, I tried to get my emotions under control so that I could go down and help my grandma. I thought that it might help me get my mind off of things for a while, so I headed downstairs arm in arm with my grandma who was wearing her favorite red sweater. 

Several people began to show up, and I greeted them with a forced smile. “Good morning! Would you like any coffee or juice to drink?”

I tried to stay busy making sure everyone’s coffee mugs stayed full and that they had the right flavor of donut available at their table. As people would ask my grandma who was helping her, she would introduce my brothers and me.

            “These are three of my wonderful grandkids. That is Trevor over there, and the other younger boy is Torey. And that is Lyndsey. She isn’t really in her cheerful mood like normal because one of her best friends was killed in a car accident this morning,” said my grandma time and time again.  Somehow, she always managed to add that fact onto the end of every introduction.

During these moments, I tried to stay strong, but they usually resulted in me walking very quickly up the stairs and into the seclusion of my grandma’s room.

“Is grandma telling everyone down there about Tylor?” asked my mom as I entered the room with tear-filled eyes.

“You know her too well!” I said as a little smile crept across my face, the first real one that had appeared all morning.

            A few days later as we were on our way home from Montana, we had to drive past the exact place where the wreck had happened. When we drove past it, I saw the torn barbed wire fence where the car had broken through, and car parts seemed to be scattered everywhere. It seemed as though a totally new dam that I didn’t know existed had broken inside of me, and the tears were falling down my face faster and faster. Looking at that site, it seemed as if a piece of me was missing. I was only 17, and it was impossible for me to think about going through the rest of my life without one of my greatest friends by my side. Senior prom, graduation, his 18^th birthday, and college were just a few events that he would never get to experience.

*     *     *

            Sitting at the table in my new apartment, eight-and-a-half hours away from all of my friends and family, I began to go through some of my old pictures. I see pictures of Tylor and me wearing our matching outfits on twin day and our pictures from prom, and I can’t believe that it has now been seven months since the car accident that took his life. Coming from the other room, I hear my phone go off indicating that I have a new text message. As I go to get it I hear my ringtone: “Long live the walls we crashed through; I had the time of my life, with you”. For a split second, I hope that I will see ‘NEW MESSAGE from TYLOR BURKE’ on the screen of my phone. Reality hits me as I see that it’s just another reminder for our ward activity. Reading the new message I realize that our lives can change at any given moment; the change can even be caused by one short text message. 

Tylor and I at Prom 

Randomness at BYU :)

So today my friend and I heard and saw some random things while walking around on campus. I thought that I would share some of these comments and things that we saw:

• A boy and girl were standing by some lockers talking and the boy said, "I think that I am more of a Regis, rather than a Jay Leno. Well as he was walking away, me and my friend decided to say Bye Regis!! And to our surprise, he totally turned around!! We quickly turned our heads the opposite way, and laughed so hard.

• My friend and I were sitting in Chemistry class when we saw the girl sitting in front of us updater her Facebook status to, "Boys, when having doubts about kissing a pretty girl, give her the benefit of the doubt." She then cited the person who said that quote and then added Anyone think I'm pretty??
• Also, while my friend and I were sitting in Chemistry we saw this boy walk in and he is wearing a bright yellow shirt with Pikachu on it. I turn to my friend and tell her these two jokes: How do you get Pikachu on the bus? You Pokemon (poke him on)!! and then Why don't you take a Pokemon to the bathroom? Because he might Pikachu (peek at you)!! My friend loved those jokes. So anyways, after class we were walking, and we see the boy wearing the Pikachu shirt just a little ways in front of us. My friend, told me that I should go tell him one of the jokes, and so I did. He didn't find it very funny though! All he said was "O. My. Gosh." He like didn't laugh or anything, and then I felt really stupid! But me and Franny both got a good laugh out of it! 

Personal Narrative Draft

I was nice and cozy in my newly finished senior quilt, when I began to hear voices and movement around me. As I rolled over to see what time it was, my eyes automatically squinted from the brightness of the light that was shining right down on me. Once my eyes adjusted, I saw that my mom, grandma, and two little brothers were already awake. It took me awhile to remember that I was in my grandma’s room at the Assisted Living Center in Butte, Montana. I sat up on the pull-out bed as I stretched, and I was tempted to lay back down and go back to sleep for a little while longer. However, that thought was interrupted as my mom told me that I needed to get in the shower and get ready for the day. After breakfast, we were going to head out to Whitehall, Montana, where there was an antique train bridge where we were going to take some senior pictures. Before getting in the shower, I decided to check my phone that had been charging on the other side of the room.

I had a text from my best friend, Jessie, asking me if I had heard the news. As I replied to that text, my mind was racing with different news that she could have been referring to. Right after I pressed SEND on my black Envy 2, my phone began to vibrate vigorously in my hands as I received several texts from some of my other friends. As I opened one of texts, my eyes read over a couple of words that I never thought I would see. My legs became Jello and I fell to my knees, and my world seemed to come crashing down on me. I checked the messages over and over, hoping and praying that I had somehow read it wrong. Tears rushed down my face as my mom came quickly over to me.

“Lyndsey! What happened?” my mom questioned as she wrapped me in hug.

At that same moment, my little brother Trevor had read something on Facebook and knew what was wrong.

Through many tears and in-between sobs, I tried to tell my mom what was going on, but all I could get out was, “Tylor. Killed. In. Car. Accident”.

            Jessie shared the details with me through text messages because she would start crying again, and it would be too hard. After receiving the few details that were known at that point, I hopped in the shower as an escape from the dreadful texts that were being sent to my phone. My tears mixed with the water pouring out of the shower head, and my head was pounding. At that point, I didn’t even want to read the messages that were sent to me to offer comfort and words of support. All I wanted to do was throw my phone out of the window and wake up from this awful nightmare. How were any words supposed to provide the comfort that I needed at that time? The attempts seemed impossible and pointless. My best friend, Tylor Burke, had just been killed in a car accident, and there I was in a totally different state. I got out of the shower and put on my maroon legging outfit that I had planned to wear for my senior pictures. The person that stared back at me in the mirror, however, did not look like she was ready to go take pictures. The girl in the mirror had glowing green eyes that were bloodshot, a blotchy skin tone, and red streaks that began at the corner of her eyes and continued down her face. She looked like a mess.

            “Lyndsey, do you want to come down and help me serve donuts and coffee downstairs? I am in charge this week and need some help,” said my grandma from the other room.

            As I finished brushing my long, brown hair, I tried to get my emotions under control so that I could go down and help my grandma. I thought that it might help me get my mind off of things for a while, so I headed downstairs arm in arm with my grandma who was wearing her favorite red sweater.  As people began to show up, I tried to stay busy as I greeted each of elderly people with a smile and asked them if they would like any coffee or juice. As people would ask my grandma who was helping her, she would introduce my brothers and she never failed to mention the fact that one of my best friends had been killed just that morning. During these moments, I tried to stay strong, but they usually resulted in me walking very quickly up the stairs and into the seclusion of my grandma’s room, where my mom would be waiting with her arms outstretched.

            A few days later as we were on our way home from Montana, we had to drive past the exact place where the wreck had happened. As we drove past it, I saw the torn barbed wire fence where the car had broken through, and car parts seemed to be scattered everywhere. It seemed as though a totally new dam that I didn’t think existed had broken and the tears were falling down my face faster and faster. Looking at that site, it seemed as if a piece of me was missing. I was only 17 and it was impossible for me to think about going through the rest of my life without one of my greatest friends by my side. Senior prom, graduation, his 18^th birthday, and college were just a few events that he would never get to experience. Even though it has now been seven months since the accident, every time my phone vibrates, I still expect to see his name pop up on my screen.

            These months without him have been very hard, but I have learned to view life with a new perspective. Although so many people have told me that I need to take advantage of every day that I wake up and every opportunity that I am given, it was reassured to me during this time. None of us are ever guaranteed another day. Nobody knows when there time here on this earth will expire, and that is something that we will never have control of. We need to live our lives to the best of our ability and need to learn to make the most of every situation we are put in. Our lives can change at any given moment; it can even change from just one short text message.

Temples

Last Tuesday I had to opportunity to go to the Provo Temple and participate in baptisms and confirmations for the dead with a couple of my friends. We were there for a couple of hours that morning, and then I went back to my apartment and finished packing, and then headed to Wyoming for Thanksgiving break. I never realized how convenient it was to live only five minutes away from the temple, because growing up we always had to drive two hours to get to the Billings, Montana temple. The Saturday after Thanksgiving, was my home wards scheduled youth trip. Our wards session was at 8:00, but everyone was encouraged to be there at 7:45 to meet all together in the distribution center. That meant that we would have to leave our house at 5:30! Even though we knew we would have to get up super early, we were too involved in playing games Friday night that we didn't get to bed very early. It seemed that just a few seconds after I had shut my eyes, my alarm was going off telling me that it was 4:30. I got up and got in the shower and got ready for the day. My littlest brother Torey, just turned 12 in October, so this was going to be his first time in the temple. He was very excited! As he was getting dressed in his church clothes, he came into my room and asked me if the socks he was going to wear were white enough. I couldn't help but smile as I told him that they were perfect! After two hours in the car, we finally arrived at the beautiful Billings Temple. Torey was all smiles as he walked out of the temple and he said that he couldn't wait for the next temple trip. He was also excited that we would get to see him pass the sacrament the next day! I am so proud of my little brother and the good choices that he is making! I am also thankful for the opportunity that I have to be only 5 minutes away from a temple so that I can go there more often!

Torey in front of the Billings, Montana Temple

This last summer as I was the primary pianist in my home ward, I loved hearing the primary kids sing with excitement the words to I Love to See the Temple. " I love to see the temple. I'm going there someday to feel the Holy Spirit, to listen and to pray. For the temple is a House of God, a place of love and beauty. I'll prepare myself while I am young; this is my sacred duty. I love to see the temple. I'll go inside someday. I'll covenant with my Father; I'll promise to obey. For the temple is a holy place where we are sealed together. As a child of God, I've learned this truth; a family is forever."
I really do love seeing many different temples, especially at night when they are all lit up. They seem to stand out even when they are surrounded with so many tall buildings. I know that we are capable of doing the same. Even when surrounded by so many worldly things, because of the Light of Christ that is inside of us, we can stand out and be examples to everyone around us.

The Billings, Montana Temple

The Faith of Emma Smith

Although it seems like my life has been pretty rough lately, I can't help but think about those who have had to suffer more than I have. Emma Smith is one of these people. She was under so much pressure being married to the prophet Joseph Smith, and was constantly worrying about the safety of her family because of all of the persecution. She endured the pain and suffering as she buried six of her children and eventually had to deal with the martyrdom of her husband and brother-in-law. I can't even imagine the heartbreak that she overcame during these hard times! Even through the deaths of her children, she was able to stay true and faithful and was always supportive of Joseph. Emma's faith was unwavering during her trials, and I try to face my hardships with that same faith!! 

"Never had an ordinary day
You never lived your life in an ordinary way
For everything you loved you paid a price
But you couldn’t let the world see you cry

Never had a moment of peace
You never felt the sunlight when the worries set you free
Everytime your life turned a page
It seemed like your heart might break

With the world on your shoulders
When the nights have grown colder
You seem to weather every storm with a queen’s grace
When you lost your husband
When you bury your children
I’m sure the angels stood in reverence
As you prayed
How much can one heart take?
How much can one heart take?

Never had a day to call your own
When so many needed your warm heart as a home
Whispering a mother’s lullaby
As you sat alone by the fire

With the world on your shoulders
When the nights have grown colder
You seem to weather every storm with a queen’s grace
When you lost your husband
When you bury your children
I’m sure the angels stood in reverence
As you prayed
How much can one heart take?
How much can one heart take?

With the world on your shoulders
When the nights have grown colder
You seem to weather every storm with a queen’s grace
When you lost your husband
When you bury your children
I’m sure the angels stood in reverence
As you prayed
And I’m sure your heart breaks 
When some people still say 
Somewhere down the line you lost your faith
How much can one heart take? 
How much can one heart take?"

Family + Food + Basketball = One Amazing Thanksgiving!!

I just love Thanksgiving! After sleeping in, I got up and watched some of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. The rest of the morning was spent lounging around and getting ready for the day. At about 1:30, my family and I grabbed the food we had made, and headed next door to my aunt and uncle's house. After saying hi to all of my cousins, uncles, aunts, and grandma, I picked a spot on the couch and we watched some basketball and then football. Once the food was all ready, we blessed the food and then dug in. There was turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, rolls, fruits, vegetables, casseroles, and jello! I filled my plate up, forgetting that there was still another counter full with different food. Although I was quite full before my first plate was finished, I somehow was able to go back to the second counter and get some more. The rest of the day was spent playing games with my little cousins, watching football, visiting with everyone, and snacking every time I walked by the kitchen. We sang Happy Birthday to my cousin Alannah, and then brought out all of the pies for dessert. I had a piece of chocolate pie. After a while, I said goodbye to everyone and headed home. I did a little bit of coloring with my mom, and then my siblings (Alisha, Trevor, and Torey) and I went down to the High School Gym and played basketball. Our cousins (Brandon, Preston, and Dalton) met us down there. We scrimmaged and played shooting games. We all love basketball and it was a ton of fun to play with all of them again! After spending an hour and a half at the gym, we came back to our house and spent the rest of the night playing Just Dance 2 on the Wii! I am so thankful for all of my family and all that they do for me! They are all wonderful examples to me and the support they show my in everything that I do means the world to me! The only way this day could have been better was if my two oldest sisters had been able to spend it with us!

Donating Blood

A few weeks ago in relief society, they passed around a sign-up sheet for donating blood. When it got to me, I signed up and was very excited. I had always wanted to donate blood, but never really had the chance. The next day, I got ready and headed to the WILK at 11:15. My appointment was scheduled for noon, but I got there a little early and filled out all of the necessary papers and read the required materials since it was my first time. After waiting for a couple of minutes, they took me back to where they had everything set up. I got my finger pricked to check my iron level and I also got my blood pressure checked and had to answer quite a few questions concerning my health on the computer. Then they took me to a chair where they put needle and tube into my arm. I was given a ball to squeeze and I began filling up my bag by squeezing the ball. It only took me 4 minutes and 46 seconds to fill my bag up with blood. This random kid came up and talked to me the whole time, so it seemed like it went by fairly fast. When the needle was removed from my arm, I only had ten minutes to get to my Book of Mormon class that was in the Talmage Building.

I got up, and felt perfectly fine. They had me go to the snack table to get some cookies and water. I already had a water bottle filled with water, so I grabbed some cookies and headed off to my class. As I went outside, I started feeling weird. By the time I was almost to the library, blackness started at the edge of my eyes and was getting bigger, creating just a little tunnel that I could see through and my legs were getting weak. But somehow I made it into the library. There was a handrail almost right inside the second door that I was going to grab onto and rest for a little while. Well I stuck my arm out to grab it, but I couldn't find it because my depth perception was off! I kept grabbing for it, but all I was getting was a handful of air. (I wouldn't have been surprised if people thought that I was drunk!!) Once I finally got a hold of it, I leaned on it and closed my eyes.

I was slowly falling to the ground when a boy and girl walking by, came up to me and asked me if I was alright. They saw the bandage on my arm and knew that I had just donated blood. They told me that I looked really pale and asked if there was anything they could do for me. While the girl went to get some more cookies, the boy sat down with me right by the entrance to the library. I was like cold sweating and just felt awful! As we both sat there, we got so many weird looks from people walking by. After sitting there for a while, eating more cookies, and drinking lots of cold water, I began to get my strength back. As I stood up and was ready to head to my class (even though I was not 15 minutes late), the nice boy and girl walked me to my class just to be sure I was ok. Although the experience was a little embarrassing, I am glad that I was able to donate my blood and that someone will benefit from it!

"Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal"

     Well this weekend was definitely one that I will never forget. As my Grandma Brown (talked about in previous post) continued to go down hill through out the week, I new that I would need to free my weekend. I called and talked to her daily although at time she seemed a little bit out of it. She was excited that my sisters and I were going to be down there in few days. Early Friday morning, my sisters (Amber and Alisha) and I left Ogden and headed to Butte, Montana. My mom and oldest sister, Nicole, had arrived there on Thursday along with my mom's two brothers. When we got to Butte, I was able to use my magnificent navigational skills and got us to the assisted living place where my grandma lived. We quickly went up to my grandmas room where my mom embraced us in a hug, and the tears rushed out of my eyes. Lying on her bed with her eyes closed, was my grandma.

     Although my grandma's eyes weren't open, she was still responsive when we got there. She would squeeze our hand when we held her hand, and would move her arms and head every once in a while. We talked to her as though nothing was wrong and made sure that she knew who all was there with her. As the day went on, many relatives called or skyped us to say their final goodbyes to my grandma. We would hold the phone next to my grandma's ear so she could hear those who called. Many of her friends who live in the same building also stopped by to give her one last hug. A couple hours after my sisters and I had gotten there, my grandma stopped reacting to anything. She would no longer squeeze our hands or react to us talking to her. The rest of the night dragged on as we all sat around in her room talking and waiting.

     It was getting pretty late so after saying goodbye to everyone, including my grandma, my Uncle Dwayne decided to head back home and my Uncle Don and Aunt Tina decided to head down to there room. We got ready for bed and laid down at about 12:30. Instead of trying to sleep, my sister Alisha sat in there chair and held my grandma's hand. At about 2:40 on 11/12/11, we all saw my grandma take her last breaths. As my grandma laid there motionless, the tears began to fall as we realized that she was gone. Right away my mom called my two uncles and they headed right over. I sat beside my grandma and as I held her hand, I felt it become cold. After our family had time alone with her, the hospice lady called the mortuary. The mortician came up and talked to us for a while and then gave us a few more minutes to say our final goodbyes before he would take the body. As my uncles, mom , and sisters approached my grandma with tear filled eyes, it broke my heart eve more. I gave my grandma one last hug, kissed her cold cheek, and told her that I loved her and would miss her. I walked out of the room arm in arm with my mom and sisters so the mortician could remove the body from her room. We walked back into the room and as I saw the indention of my grandmas body still on the bed, I knew that things would be different.

     My grandma was fighting lung cancer as well as two brain tumors. She lasted way longer than she was expected to and I never heard her complain. She was a fighter and loved her family very much. All the nurses loved her and told us that they knew almost everything that was going on in our lives because my grandma would keep them updated. I will never forget all of the memories we had together and the love that she showed me. I am comforted by the knowledge that I have that she is not suffering anymore and that she has been reunited with her husband, parents, sister, and two grandchildren. Although we are mourning her loss down here on earth, I know that there was a joyous reunion up above. I am also thankful that I was able to receive the comfort that I needed from my family members as we all faced this hardship together. My dad and brothers came up on Saturday after they found out the news, so we were able to have my whole family together. I love my family!!

Me hugging my Grandma Brown at my High School Graduation

TRUST

On Saturday night, I had the opportunity to go rock climbing at The Quarry with a few of my roommates and our friend Adam. It was very fun, and definitely an arm workout! My roommate Allyson was my partner. One of us would climb as the other one would belay, and then we would switch. As I climbed up the wall for the first time, I was scared to fall because I wasn't sure how the whole belay thing worked. The only type of rock climbing I had done previous to this experience was on the Army's rock wall where you didn't need a belayer. As I reached the top for the first time, I was hesitant to lean back and put my trust in the knot that was connecting me to the belay rope. I finally built up the courage and relied on Allyson, my belayer, to gently lead me back to solid ground. After we succeeded the first time, it was a lot easier to do it the next few times. We had an enjoyable time, and I am glad that I had a belayer who would always tighten the slack and catch me whenever I got to a hard spot in the wall and had to let go. She was also very encouraging from the bottom, always pushing me to keep going and to not give up. 
When I got back to my apartment that night, I skyped my mom and little brother who were in Montana visiting my Grandma Brown. I talked to my little brother, Torey, first and as I talked to him I watched my mom help my grandma into bed. With not much strength available, my grandma has to be assisted in the simple tasks that most of us take for granted. As Torey handed the computer to my grandma, I couldn't hold back the tears. She was lying in bed, and wasn't looking very well. As she saw the tears in my eyes, she told me how she would be able to see my grandpa again and that everyone has their time to go. Although those weren't the words I wanted to hear, they did offer a little comfort. I talked to my grandma for a while and then decided I better let my sisters skype her, so I told her that I loved her and that I would talk to her later. As I sat in sacrament meeting the next day and listened to the testimonies of others, I couldn't stop thinking about trust. All I can do right now is put my trust in the Lord because I know that he has a plan and that things will work out for the better, even if they aren't the way I want them to go. When I think about the conditions my grandma is in right now, as she is fighting lung cancer along with two brain tumors, I truly find comfort in the knowledge that we will not suffer anymore once we leave this earth. Our body will return to its perfect condition, and my grandma will not be in pain anymore. I have no idea how much longer the Lord will allow her to stay on this earth with us, but I do know that the Lord hears and answers our prayers in accordance to the plan that he has created for us. I know that I can trust in the Lord because he is one thing that will never change. No matter the circumstances he will always be there for me, encouraging me to push through the hard times so I can make it to the top and enjoy the wonderful view-- Just as Allyson did as my belayer when rock climbing.
"Trust:  reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence"

Me and my Grandma Brown after my high school graduation 

Beautiful Heartbreak

I absolutely love this song! The lyrics are beautiful and can apply to everyone! 

"I had it all mapped out in front of me, Knew just where I wanted to go; But life decided to change my plans, And I found a mountain in the middle of my road. I knew there was no way over it, So I searched for a way around; Brokenhearted I started climbin', And at the top I found... Every fear, every doubt, All the pain I went through; Was the price that I paid to see this view; And now that I'm here I would never trade... The grace that I feel, And the faith that I find; Through the bitter-sweet tears, And the sleepless nights; I used to pray he'd take it all away, But instead it became a beautiful heartbreak..I never dreamed my heart would make it, I thought about turning around; But heaven has shown me miracles, I never would have seen from the ground. Now I take the rain with the sunshine, Cause there's one thing that I know; He picks up the pieces, Along each broken road. Every fear, every doubt, All the pain I went through; Was the price that I paid to see this view; And now that I'm here I would never trade... The grace that I feel, And the faith that I find; Through the bitter-sweet tears, And the sleepless nights. I used to pray he'd take it all away, But instead it became a beautiful heartbreak. I would never trade... The grace that I feel, And the faith that I find; Through the bitter-sweet tears, And the sleepless nights. I used to pray he'd take it all away, But instead it became a beautiful heartbreak."

Seeing and Listening to the Prophet of God-- What an AMAZING experience!!

I knew from the moment that I woke up, that today was going to be a great day! I didn't have class this morning so I was able to get up and head to the Marriott Center early. One of my friends had been standing in line at 8:00 and me and one if my roomies decided to go and join him. It was raining and cold outside so we made sure to bundle up. As we arrived at the Marriott Center, it made me smile when I saw a couple hundred umbrellas and students all lined up waiting to get good seats. As the doors opened at 9:30, everyone walked a little quicker than normal, and luckily my friends and I were able to get really good seats! We we right in the middle section in row 21. While we were waiting, I decided that I would do my Book of Mormon assignment and I also started writing a letter to my friend who is on his mission. The piano was being tuned, the choir was warming up, there was a constant stream of people filing to different seats, and their was a feeling of excitement in the air. As the piano began to play and everyone began standing up, my heart began beating so fast. When I saw Thomas S. Monson, the Prophet of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I couldn't help but smile. It was also exciting to see his daughter Ann M. Dibb as well as Russell M. Nelson!
As President Monson spoke inspired words, there was no doubt in my mind that he truly was the Prophet of God! His smile is contagious, and his humor keeps everybody interested. Here are a few thoughts that I wrote down as I listened to him speak.
     *The followers of Christ should be lights to the world
     * light = something that illuminates
     * "Be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity."
     * Keep our lights shining bright - for others to see and follow
     * We are spiritual beings having a physical experience
     * It is up to each of us to develop the faith needed to survive
     * Faith and doubt cannot exist at the same time in the same mind
     * When you choose to follow Christ you choose to be changed
     * "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your father which is in heaven"   
     * Our opportunities to shine are limitless, they surround us every day
One of the things that stuck with me the most was when he quoted the Disney movie The Lion King. He applied them to us today as he told us "You are more than what you have become. Remember who you are! You are sons and daughters of God!" I will never forget this wonderful experience and especially the peace and reassurance I felt!!